Author Topic: Korat - The case of the missing plank with a pee & poo hole  (Read 885 times)


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Weird job, but someone has to do it

Dealing with bizarre complaints is all in a day's work for Nong Niemsungnoern

Nong Niemsungnoern has a unique qualification in his role as a Crime Suppression Division officer. While his colleagues prefer handling serious criminal investigation duties, the 51-year-old police sergeant specialises in handling unusual complaints his friends prefer to ignore.

Dubbed "investigator of weird cases", Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong says he recognises the merit of talking to these complainants during his 30 years of service even though their complaints might sound eccentric, fictional, silly or outright crazy.

Most of his cases involve stubborn visitors who refuse to go away unless they are allowed to have their cases registered with the CSD.

"I'll leave this case to you, Nong," his boss often says.

Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong recalls a case which was handed to him two years ago by his boss before darting out of the room, leaving him sitting face to face with an elderly woman.

Without disclosing her name, Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong told the Bangkok Post he felt obliged to listen to the woman after learning from her that the local police in Nakhon Ratchasima had refused to pay any attention to her case despite her numerous complaints.

The woman spoke at length about assets left to her by her dead husband before demanding that police find a particular item which had disappeared.

"What she wanted was nothing more than a wooden plank," Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong said.

The plank, part of the floor in her bedroom, was a special "device" which had become part of her nightly routine.

A hole in the middle allowed her to urinate and defecate whenever she wished without having to walk to the toilet at night.

It disappeared when her house was knocked down. She saw nobody to turn to but the police to help her.

Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong called officers in Nakhon Ratchasima. A burst of laughter was heard on the phone when they learned the old woman travelled to Bangkok to search for the plank.

Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong said he was not amused. He felt the only way to make the woman happy with the complaint was to show her that the police took her case seriously.

The woman later agreed to leave after he gave her a copy of a printed record of her case and a handkerchief carrying the CSD emblem as a souvenir.

"We have to listen to their stories," Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong said. "If they want to talk, let them."

In another case, Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong said a man in his mid 40s with an anxious look appeared at the CSD, demanding to talk with its commander. His colleagues again called him for help.

"I'm a commander here," Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong opened the conversation, a greeting powerful enough to prompt the man to give him a wai.

The man claimed he was being followed by two groups.

One was made up of unidentified men wanting to harm him and the other consisted of plainclothes policemen who helped protect him from the first group.

The CSD officer said he was told by the man he had quarrelled with a prison chief who wanted him to marry his daughter. The man had refused because: "I have no courage to pick a flower of high birth," Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong quoted him as saying.

"This is stupid," Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong said.

"But if you argue with him or refuse to register his complaint, he would cause trouble and refuse to leave."

Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong said he had decided to play along and assured the man he would be safe under the protection of the group of plainclothes policemen.

The interview ended after an hour. The man appeared happy and left the CSD.

Other CSD officers might say the woman and the man he had dealt with were crazy, Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong said.

But these kinds of people, crazy as they might seem, still need police care and someone to talk to who would listen to them.

On the bright side, the fact that these "weird people" come to the police shows that the police still have some good image left amid the present widespread negative reports about the force.

"They're weird, but they're still confident in the police," Pol Sr Sgt Maj Nong said.

"Otherwise they wouldn't have consulted us with their weird stories.

Bangkok Post