Author Topic: The bar girl stories  (Read 602 times)

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Offline thaiga

The bar girl stories
« on: September 28, 2018, 12:12:09 PM »
The bar girl stories

double standards, an article from bangkokseven who seems to be, or sounds an expert on the goings on in the seedy side of the bar girls.

Thai double standard—that the rules which apply to foreigners do not necessarily apply to any Thai watching you like a hawk to ensure you follow them. This can also be said about bar girls (and gogo dancers, and freelancers) who have taken a liking to you and don’t want anyone else—especially not anyone else where they work—to get their greedy hands on you or your money.

Not all are this way. I’ve had and currently have playmates who aren’t fussed about sharing. In fact sometimes they come over for a play date together. But that’s rare. Still others are happy with a don’t-ask-don’t-tell relationship where everything’s left up to their imagination and they try not to imagine anything. But most of the time, the situation is this: you take up with a girl at a particular place, and that girl stakes a claim on you, and no one else at the bar is allowed to have at you until at least a year after you’ve stopped banging her. And if her friends change bars, it’s possible they’ll spread the word at the new place that you’ve already got some other girl’s claws in you and are off limits. Most of the time, through some kind of “honor among bar girls” code, this works, and you’re cast off like a leper. This happens to me on a regular basis. I even had one girl go so far as to make it known in the entire town that I was not to be touched. Granted, that town was Ao Nang so it was easy to do given its size. But it’s a testament to the power of a powerful Thai working girl. Some have a lot of sway. That means that the times when we fought, and she went off to bang a random customer just to spite me, hard as I tried to do the same, all I got was “Not go with you….you boyfriend Ta. She tell me already.

Thats frustrating, I tell you what. Thank Buddha I live in Bangkok now. It’s a big city, and I haven’t found a gogo girl yet who has a grip on all of it. As a matter of fact, no one as far as I can tell can even survey all of Patpong, my home away from home away from America. Even after many years, I can still slip from bar to bar, unmarked for the most part, and have honeys in multiple locations, all blissfully unaware of each other.

So cheating on your bar girl is an actual thing, and I should know because I do it a lot. And here’s how:
Success or failure depends on what you do and the choices you make right at the start. I typically make myself a familiar sight at a bar days or even weeks before taking a run at somebody. And I choose that somebody based on a few key factors. First, she should be a diamond in the rough, meaning fairly new to the scene and not quite aware of her own attractiveness yet (like Cosette in Les Miserables) and so generally overlooked by the average punter. Second, she should speak very little English. This has the doubly-beneficial indication of the girl’s lack of experience as well as a vajay that still has that new car smell. Finally—and above all—she should be reluctant to go with or even speak to farang. Ideally, she’s already told her friends that she won’t even go home with a customer, and is only there for the regular dancer’s wage. The best thing a girl can tell me in our first conversation is “I not go with customer.” Perfect.

I’m not going to tell you the process by which I change her mind. I don’t give away trade secrets. Suffice to say that, in time, she does. She becomes a regular at Club Seven (I named my apartment Club Seven, because there’s almost always a party going on). But she doesn’t want her friends to know she sees me so she makes me swear not to tell anyone. And so of course, I swear. In the meantime, I find another girl at the same bar who also “never goes with customers” and get her on the hook as well. She also makes me promise not to tell anyone that she comes over. So I go to the bar, sit with one on either side, buy both a drink, grope them both, get kisses from both, and when I leave one turns to the other and asks, “Do you go with him?” to which the other replies “No, do you?” to which she responds “Of course not.” And all is right with the world. The most I’ve been able to wrangle from a single bar using this method is four. Four is too many, by the way.

Then you have to work out the days of the week and/or times on the weekend in which to have them over…getting them in and out without being seen, cleaning up before and after, maintaining stamina. It takes a bit of work, but it beats monogamy or being alone. And if you like excitement, it’s kind of fun. Once you’re found out, though, it all falls apart. You go from glory to garbage in a day’s time, and have the mark of Cain at that bar from that point onward. But if you’re turned on by the espionage aspect of whoring—the….whorespionage—it’s worth the risk. You feel like a 10th rate James Bond, and let’s be honest—that’s the closest I’m gonna get to being James Bond.

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.

Offline thaiga

Re: The bar girl stories - never fall in love
« Reply #1 on: September 29, 2018, 12:32:01 PM »
paradise, as long as you do one simple thing: never fall in love

a bad experience

Just to recap, my philosophy on relationships between Thai women and farang men are simple: don’t do it. Some couples beat the odds and find true love, but more often than not, you the farang are going to walk away with your heart shattered and your wallet vacuumed dry. You’ll probably go back to your home country with your tale of woe between your legs and a hundred warnings to all your buddies about the evil succubi inhabiting the Land of Smiles. And you’d be correct, except for one thing—it’s not the girl’s fault. It’s yours.

I’m going on nearly a decade as a resident in the greatest country in the world known as Thailand, and in that time I’ve gotten to know more than a handful of the captivating women who help make this place paradise—and it is paradise, as long as you do one simple thing: never fall in love. That’s my secret to success, and why I can happily say that (with one small exception to be exposited below) every relationship I’ve had and currently have with every seductive siren I’ve been lucky enough to cross beds with has been a happy and rewarding one. I’ve never been dumped, cheated-on, or had my heart broken in Thailand. I’ve never had so much as a mild argument with any of the women with whom I’ve consorted. Not a single one of them would have a bad thing to say about me, and neither would I about them. My stress level regarding relationships, on a scale of 1 to 10, has for the last 8 years been holding steady at zero.

How do I do it? Simple. I don’t invest emotionally in any relationship. I don’t subscribe to the ridiculous notion of monogamy nor the childish fantasy of a thing called “love,” nor do I expect fidelity or fealty from anyone.  The underlying philosophy of my approach is not shaped exclusively by experiences with Thai women. The world at large is mostly populated with idiots who 1—don’t know what love is, 2—couldn’t love correctly even if they knew what it is, and 3—are so broken and pathetic that they look to other people to give their lives meaning. They heap all their feelings of self-worth on their partner, giving that person the power to validate or crush them depending on whether or not they stay together or break up. That’s just stupid. So the first step for any sane, mentally stable person is to learn how to be alone and be OK with it. If you can’t find value in life apart from how hard you can latch on to someone else like a barnacle, then all of your relationships are inherently doomed. But I digress.

a perfect world would be one where a guy had not just one, but a handful of ladies that he could see consistently on different days of the week, without any claims of ownership or loyalty apart from good times, honesty, and regular bedroom gymnastics. Of course, that would never fly in the West. Women are too insecure, possessive, and covetous with a man’s time, affection, and money. But it could theoretically work in Thailand. So I abandoned my search for “the one” and instead widened my focus to allow for more than one lady to catch my eye. And it worked. At the moment, I’m juggling 6 friends-with-benefits-style relationships. They’re each lovely in their own way, and thus far have been content to visit my apartment a few times per month and get up to some naughty business in exchange for small gifts, polite conversation, and taxi fares.

Some of them have Thai boyfriends and have to sneak over. Some know about each other and visit in pairs. In short, I am their friend and part-time benefactor, and they are each a sometimes friend and playmate. They range in age between 18 and 25. My favorite one has been with me for 5 years. She considers me one of her closest friends and I can honestly say I care for her, as far as I’m able to care for anyone. For I long-ago burned and cauterized that part of my soul. I have no interest in it. Good friends, yes. Also benefits. That’s as far as it goes. Thankfully, she has a Thai boyfriend for all the lovey-dovey stuff, and also the arguments, power struggle, and eventual horrible break-up. I skip all that, with all of them, and instead reap only the benefits.

So I never argue with my girls. There’s nothing to argue over. Once you take monogamy and possession out of the equation, what is there to get upset about? Now, I know there are some cynics who will read this and say “They’re just prostitutes and you’re their customer.” First, they’re not bar girls. Most of them were at one time, but now they’re baristas, uni students, 7-11 clerks, and stay-at-home-moms. None of them are strictly slinging their naughty parts for cash. So they’re not prostitutes. At least, no more or less than any other woman. I exchange money and friendship for sex and friendship. As far as I can tell, once you strip away the belief in fidelity and false validation of a modern “love” relationship, what you have left is the same exact exchange. I calculated that my last American girlfriend, who left me for someone better-looking after 2 years, cost me $20 thousand (the price of keeping a smoking-hot girl happy in Los Angeles) in that short amount of time. Six friends with benefits run less than a third of that, all without any of the headache. So if by prostitution, we mean “exchanging one thing for another thing” like sex for love or sex for security, then all women are on the same playing field. Men too, in that they give up something they have in order to obtain something they want. And if we’re looking strictly at work and risk versus reward, there’s no comparison. My harem beats a traditional relationship hands down.

This lifestyle isn’t without its downside. Periodically, two or more of my girls will want to see me on the same day, which creates all kinds of problems, beginning with scheduling. How to fit everyone in while giving me time to rest in between? And at my age, it’s getting harder and harder (wrong choice of words) to perform multiple times per day. I’m literally out of juice by the end. Or the times when a girl wants to see me more than I want to be seen. Thinking up excuses besides “I’m bored with you” can be mentally exhausting. And then there are other days when I want company but nobody calls, and all my efforts to get someone over fail. It’s feast or famine.

But compared to the ball-busting hell-scape that is dating in the West, and the monotonous tedium of relationships in general, I’d say I’m as close to the high end of the happy scale as a guy can get. If you can pull it off—and if you can overcome the notion that you need someone in order to be someone—you’ll be much happier, too.
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
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Online Taman Tun

Re: The bar girl stories
« Reply #2 on: September 29, 2018, 01:43:23 PM »
Sounds as if this guy could get just as much emotional satisfaction from a sex doll.  It would save on cost and avoid double booking problems.
“No one in this world, so far as I know—and I have searched the record for years, and employed agents to help me—has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people.” - H L Mencken

Offline nan

Re: The bar girl stories
« Reply #3 on: September 29, 2018, 02:22:08 PM »
hi mr. tum. hope your keeping well. a china doll even.  the heading of the article, bar girl stories so a story it might well be.

he might get just as much emotional satisfaction from a sex doll and it would save on cost as the doll has no hanger ons and doesn't eat nothing
or in this case it might  :o
ignorance does not help your post one bit but it probably says an awful lot about you.

Online Taman Tun

Re: The bar girl stories
« Reply #4 on: September 29, 2018, 02:31:17 PM »
OK Nan, the story might be as genuine as a TripAdvisor review.
“No one in this world, so far as I know—and I have searched the record for years, and employed agents to help me—has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people.” - H L Mencken
The following users thanked this post: nan

Offline Johnnie F.

Re: The bar girl stories
« Reply #5 on: September 29, 2018, 04:22:07 PM »
Haven't read or heard any Henry-Miller-style account for a while. ;)

Quiet Days in Clichy is a novella written by Henry Miller. It is based on his experience as a Parisian expatriate in the early 1930s...
Fun is the one thing that money can't buy

Offline thaiga

A longish dated story, well worth the read with a lot of truth, about a young girl from isaan, who when she grew up, she would dream about finding a rich farang to be her husband. He would take care of her family and they would all live in a big house and she would have many babies and life would be wonderful. Although she dreamed about it, she had no idea how to actually find a rich farang. she had seen a few in the big city near her village but had never spoken to one and would not know what to say if one spoke to her.

her final words to the story. after her ordeal she encountered.  I am learning how to get as much out of the farang as possible.

I was born into a small village in Isaan, in the north east of Thailand. My mother and father worked hard as farmers and did there very best to give me a good life. I have 4 brothers and 2 sisters but I am the youngest in the family. I am lucky to be the youngest because that makes me special. My family has always spoiled me but I also have a special responsibility to look after my parents, as they grow old. It is very important that the youngest daughter takes special care of elderly parents and I am privileged to have this special role.

I remember when I was six years old; electricity first arrived in my village. It was amazing to be able to flick a switch and have a light come on. It was two more years before we had running water in out house. I used to love going to the river with my mother to get water. All of us kids had a great time playing in the shallow water while our mothers did washing and stuff. When I was seven, a special project done by Americans put taps in every house so that we could have water whenever we wanted. My mother was very excited but I liked going to the river better.

The village school I attended was a lot of fun and I really enjoyed learning about things. I was second in my class and everyone used to think I was really clever. While we were learning all about our culture, I could see many things changing in my village. I suppose we were poor but nobody knew that then, so I was not worried about it. If the rainy season was good there was always plenty of rice to eat and when the rice harvest wasn't so good, everybody shared what we had and nobody was starving. Our family was the third family to get a TV when I was nine years old. I had seen a TV before when we went into town but having one I could watch whenever I wanted was very nice. One of my older brothers had a job in the city and although he did not earn much money, he saved enough to buy the TV for us.

When I finished junior school at 12 years of age I wanted to go to high school but my parents could not afford the fees and they wanted me to help around the house and on the farm. My oldest brother was already married and my parents had to pay a big dowry, 30,000 baht. His new wife was very beautiful and her family was quite rich with a very big rice farm and they also had a small pick up truck.

More than anything else my father wanted a truck just like theirs. One day someone told him the bank would lend him the money to buy a truck because our farm was very valuable. You can't imagine how excited we all were when Papa bought the truck home for the first time. I did not know much about money and banks but I know now we had to pay 30,000 baht interest each year for ten years and after 10 years all the original 300,000 baht had to be paid back. By now my second brother was also working in the city and he could help a little bit with the loan payments. Over the next few years all my brothers got married and all found good wives with good families. My parents were very proud of this and although they had to borrow more money for the dowries, they did not mind. They were very proud that my brothers had such fine wives and in our village everyone thought we must be a very good family.

When Nit, my eldest sister got married we had a very big party. Although her husband's family were not as rich as us, they paid 20,000 baht for a dowry and Pong, her husband, came to live with us. When the babies started arriving, I helped my sister at home and I also helped Pong on the farm, as my parents were now too old to do too much work. These were very happy days for me and I did not mind the hard work.

I was 20 when I found out my father was very worried about the bank. One way or another he had managed to pay the interest each year but the loan would be finished in 3 years and if we did not pay it back the bank would take our farm. It is tradition in my village that the farm would be split between me and my sisters and our families. If we lost the farm, I would never find a husband and with no land how would I support myself.

The loan was now 500,000 baht because my father had borrowed more to pay for my brother's weddings and had also brought a motorbike for Pong and a washing machine for Mama. I had never heard of anyone having 500,000 baht and could not imagine how our family would ever get such a big amount of money.

There was one lady in our village who owned a very big house and seemed to have all the money she wanted. She was married to a farang from Germany and spent a lot of time away from the village with her husband in Germany. Every year she came back to the village for three months and lived in her big house. I was too afraid to speak to her but I heard many stories about how she got a farang. I used to dream about finding a rich farang to be my husband. He would take care of my family and me and we would all live in a big house and I would have many babies and life would be wonderful. Although I dreamed about it, I had no idea how to actually find a rich farang. I had seen a few in the big city near my village but I had never spoken to one and would not know what to say if one spoke to me.

One day, Toi, an old school friend of mine was visiting the village. She had gone away to Bangkok to look for work. She told me about a place called Pattaya where lots of farang came to look for a Thai wife. She said I could make very big money if I came to Pattaya and worked in a bar and went with farang and if I were lucky, a rich one would marry me and take care of my family and me forever. It sounded just like my dream but the part about going with farang shocked me. I thought about it every day and how all my family's problems would be fixed if I did it but I was terrified of the idea.

Then the Thailand economy got very bad and my brothers all lost their jobs. We could not even pay the interest on the loans let alone pay back the 500,000 baht. My father who used to be a very happy man became withdrawn and never spoke to anyone. He was very worried because our farm has >been in the family for hundreds of years and it seemed he was going to be the one to lose it. Then he got sick and had to go to hospital. There was something wrong with his heart. The doctor said he could not do much at the government hospital but for 200,000 baht he could have an operation in a private hospital that would fix the problem.

Mama wanted to try and borrow more money from the bank to pay for the operation but Papa would not let her. He said he was old and it would be a waste of money. I used to go to the government hospital every day to bring him food and to hold his hand. One day I arrived with my mother and his bed was empty. He had died in the night and they had already taken him away. I cried and cried and cried but Mama was very strong and made all the arrangements for the funeral. She had to borrow money from my uncle to pay for everything but it was very important for her to give Papa a good funeral.

Now we were a very poor family and soon we would lose our land as well. I prayed to Buddha every night to help but things only seemed to get worse. I knew I had to do something but the only way I had ever heard of making big money was to work in Pattaya. I phoned Toi in Pattaya and asked if she could find me a job. She said it would be easy and I could stay in her room as well if I liked. I thought and thought about it, not sure if I could really do it. Somehow I found the strength to go and see my uncle to borrow 350 baht for the bus fare. I told him I could get a job in a restaurant in Pattaya. I think he knew what I had in mind as he looked at me in a funny way but he leant me the money anyway.

I told everyone the restaurant story and everybody came into town too see me off at the bus station. On the twelve-hour ride to Pattaya I had lots of time to wonder about the future. What would Pattaya be like, could I find a rich man to take care of my family and me and what would it be like to talk to a farang. I was terrified and excited all at the same time.

PT2 below
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.

Offline thaiga


I am learning how to get as much out of the farang as possible

Toi was at the bus station to meet me and took me to her room. It was small but comfortable and she shared with three other ladies. Twenty minutes after I arrived it was time for Toi to go to work. She dressed in very sexy clothes and put on make up. Next to her I really looked like someone who had just walked off the farm (which is exactly what I was). I could never wear clothes like that and I was already thinking this was not such a good idea. She took me to the bar and introduced me to the Mamasan. A. A was a very nice lady and said I could work at her bar if I liked but first I could just watch and see if I liked it.

Many farang came and went and the other ladies all seemed to have fun talking and laughing and even kissing them. I had never seen so many farang in my life but I could not understand a word they said. One tried to talk to me but I did not know what he was saying and I felt sick in my stomach. I told Toi I was going for a walk and as I walked along the beach, I saw things I'd never seen in my life and couldn't even have imagined before. Bars and farang and Thai girls everywhere. Huge shops with things for sale that I had never seen before. It made my head hurt just to look.

I sat down near the beach to try and think about what I was going to do. A farang came up to me and touched my bum and said some things I didn't understand. It scared me and I ran away back to Toifs bar. I told her about the man on the beach and she laughed. She said girls that didn't work in bars went to the beach to find farangs. She said he wanted to have sex with me. I couldn't believe it and felt incredibly stupid. It was all too much for me and I asked Toi if I could go back to her room. The next day I borrowed the bus fare from Toi and was on the bus home ± this was something I could not do.

At home everything was familiar including all the old problems. I cried every night because I was so stupid and could not do what had to be done to help my family. I had to find the strength somewhere to get the money. I made offerings to the spirits and prayed really hard for Buddha to help me. I went to the temple and talked to a monk about the future. He told me I would have a rich husband within two years and all my problems would be solved. He also gave me a special blessing to help me find the strength to do what I had to do.

My uncle gave me the money for the bus fare and before I knew it I was back in Toifs room in Pattaya. This time I didn't think about it but just told A, I wanted to work. Toi tried to help me put on some make up but it never looked the same on me as it did on her. I worked for three days in the bar without ever talking to a farang. I learned to play the connect 4 game and on my fourth day I played it with a farang. He was very old and hairy but he seemed to like playing the game with me although I could only say hello in English.

He talked to A and said he wanted to take me short time. I didn't know what that meant. A told me I could go with him for two or three hours and we would have sex and then he would give me 500 baht. I was very scared but said OK. We walked what seemed a very long way at a very fast pace and then got a taxi to his hotel. In his room I had no idea what to do but he pointed to the shower so I locked myself in the bathroom and showered for about thirty minutes. Then I heard a knock on the door and he said something so I thought I'd better come out. I wrapped a towel around me and came out. He wanted to kiss me but I felt sick so just kissed a little bit. He went to have a shower and I got into bed.

I was a virgin and had no idea what to expect. When he came out we had sex. It hurt me and I bled on the bed. He seemed angry with me because he thought I was having my period. Then he gave me 500 baht and told me to leave by pointing at the door. I showered quickly and then left the room. I had no idea where I was and could not find a taxi to take me back to Toifs room. I started walking and could not help crying. I felt very bad and knew I was doing something that was not good. Still I had made 500 baht in twenty minutes. My brother had to work for seven days to make that sort of money.

I soon got used to working in the bar and even learnt a little bit of English. Some of the men were kind to me and some were horrible. I got used to having sex and although it always hurt a bit I didn't mind because I was making good money. At the end of the first month I was able to send 10,000 baht home. That was more money than I had ever seen in one place before in my life.
One day a younger than usual guy came to the bar. His name was Mike.

I liked him right away and he seemed different from the others. He paid my bar fine and took me to an expensive restaurant to eat. One meal cost 1,000 baht. That would be enough to feed 40 people back home. We talked with the help of phrase books and he made me laugh a lot. Then we went to a disco. I am not a very good dancer but when they played some Isaan music I introduced Mike to Laos dancing. We had a lot of fun that night and we got back to the hotel something strange happened. For the first time I actually enjoyed having sex. Mike seemed to go much slower than other farang and I really liked kissing him.

PT.3 below
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.

Offline thaiga


I am learning how to get as much out of the farang as possible.

The next day we went to the beach and up a big tower before we went back to the bar. Mike paid my barfine for 6 days ± the rest of the time he would be in Pattaya. It was the best week of my life. We did many things I'd never done before; he brought me presents of clothes and a gold necklace. On our last day together he said that he loved me and wanted to take me home to his country. I couldn't believe it and felt really excited. It seemed that all my problems were coming to an end and the life I had always dreamed of was about to begin.

Mike said that he would have to get special papers for me to be able to go to his country and that he would be back within three months to get me. I had to make a passport in Bangkok. He said he wanted me to stop going with farang and to work as a bartender in the bar. He spoke with A who said that I could do that if I liked. When he left for the airport I thought my heart would break but I was happy that he would be back in three months to take me to my new life.

Mike gave me 3,000 baht to get my passport but he didn't give me any money for the week we spent together. I though that was strange but Toi and the other ladies in the bar said farang were really funny about giving money to their girlfriends. Once we were married, money would not be a problem. I could not live on the 3,000 baht salary a bartender got let alone send money home to help my family so I had to keep going with farang. I decided not to tell Mike because I was afraid he would be angry with me.

I told everyone about my rich farang who was going to marry me and take care of my family for ever after. Some of the girls in the bar said I should keep it a secret as farang were always bullshitting and maybe I'd never see him again. I knew they were wrong because the bond between Mike and me was very special. He rang me every week to update me on progress with the visa and to see how I was. It was very difficult talking on the phone because my English was no good but just hearing his voice made me happy.

Sometimes when he rang I was with a farang but my friends at the bar would tell him I was sick or had a day off. Soon we were making plans for our reunion. I had my passport and Mike had all the papers for a visa. I had already arranged to go back to work as a bartender before he arrived.

The day he walked back into the bar I was so happy and excited I thought my heart would burst. He wanted me to stop working so that he would not have to pay a barfine everyday and of course I agreed. I had our last two weeks in Thailand all planned. Three days in Pattaya with just the two of us and then one week at my village so Mike could meet my family and then the last few days in Bangkok sorting out the visa and airline tickets for me.

The first two days were great and it was just like old times. Mike was not very happy on the bus trip back to my village. He said the bus was no good and the traffic was no good and the food was no good but I supposed it was a big change for him.

When we arrived in the village everyone was there to meet us. We had a big party that night and I asked Mike to buy some beer and whiskey for everyone. He seemed surprised that he had to do this but we all had a good time and got very drunk. When it was time to go to sleep Mike wanted to sleep with me. I had to tell him that was against our customs and he would have to sleep in the room with the other unmarried men. He was very unhappy about this but agreed reluctantly.

The next day my uncle who could speak a little English had a talk with Mike. He wanted to discuss how much the dowry for me would be. My mother was very excited that I was going to marry a rich farang and was wondering how much money she would have after paying off the bank loan. When my uncle asked Mike how much he wanted to give, Mike just laughed. Later he told me he was not going to give anything as he was marrying me and not my mother. I was horrified. How could I explain this to my mother and what about the family's problems. If I went away with Mike who would look after my family and how could they pay the bank.

I tried to explain our customs to Mike but he did not seem to understand. That night I cried again for the first time in three months. What was I supposed to do now? Everything was going wrong and I didn't know what to do about it. Mama told me that if I married Mike I would be finished as far as the family was concerned. She said he was no good and stupid as well.

The next day Mike wanted to go back to Bangkok. He said the village was dirty and boring and too hot without air conditioning. He also hated the food. As we traveled back in the bus we were both very quiet. Everything had gone wrong and I didn't know how to fix it. We stayed in a hotel somewhere in Bangkok but Mike said he wanted to go out alone and think about our problems. He did not come back that night till 3 in the morning and when he did come back he was drunk.

He said he knew I had been seeing other farang while he had been away and that my family only wanted his money. He said it was a stupid idea for him to marry a slut anyway and he wanted me to go back to Pattaya in the morning. I couldn't believe things had turned so bad. I thought I had made everything good for him but he seemed to hate me. I couldn't sleep with him while feeling so bad so I spent the rest of the night sleeping on the bathroom floor.

The next day Mike gave me 100 baht for the bus fare back to Pattaya and told me to go. I cried all the way back to Pattaya. What was I going to tell everyone at the Bar? What bad thing had I done to make everything so bad? I knew everyone would say I was stupid to love a farang. Many people told me farang only think of themselves but I thought Mike was different.

Mike went home two weeks ago now and I know I will never see him again. I have hardened my heart and will never make such a stupid mistake again. Next time a farang loves me I will get as much money from him as possible but I will never open my heart to one again. It hurts too much and I think I hate them all. I don't understand why they are so rich while we are so poor. What I do understand is that I need money for my family and I am going to get as much as possible. What happens to me doesn't matter but I want to do everything for my family.

I have not contacted anyone in my village since Mike left. I don't know what I can say to them. I have lost so much face I don't think I can ever go home again. I still send the money though and I'm earning even more now because I am learning how to get as much out of the farang as possible.
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.

Offline thaiga

Re: The bar girl stories
« Reply #9 on: September 29, 2018, 09:51:12 PM »
LOL did i say a longish post, i think its one of the best storys we've had, and its an isaan girl, see what we do to em!
the farang again.  ;)
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.


  • Guest
Re: The bar girl stories
« Reply #10 on: September 30, 2018, 11:27:42 AM »
a dowry is the custom, but to expect a stranger to the family to pay the family debts whats built up over some time, is a hard one to swallow.
when the guy found out the score he was gone not seen no more  mike fright took flight


Offline thaiga

Re: The bar girl stories - I guess I'm a dreamer
« Reply #11 on: September 30, 2018, 03:40:54 PM »
I guess I'm a dreamer

If there's one thing Thailand has become famous for, it's the holiday romance. Married, single, divorced - it doesn't matter for the Thai girl, who will be on the lookout for the Farang who will make her life less of a hardship.

It's easy to see how romance blossoms under the sun and I was one of those caught up in the world of beer and bars.

I'm a bus driver in the UK and to this day still totally besotted with Nong, a lovely girl from Burriram. She was the girl who became my exotic long time friend, on the other side of the world.

Or so I thought. We met in a bar in Pattaya where Nong worked as 'a bar girl' . She gave me the sad dog look and told me I was her only customer that night.

Absolute nonsense of course. I bought her a drink, and then we had a load more until her boss made some signs that meant "Are you going to take her out for the night or do you want her short time?".

At least that's what Nong told me the signs meant - I hadn't a clue. I was so naive I didn't even know their job was to entertain their male customers and get paid for the pleasure they bring, sometimes a different one every night.

I found out later the very name 'bar girl' often brings sneers from many people.

I thought it was just me she liked, but over time I learnt how it all works and how you can get screwed.

But I didn't care - at least I thought I didn't. I guessed Nong had been around the block a few times but for me, at that time, she was mine.
Fact was that she was great to be with and a very funny person, always had a huge smile from ear to ear and absolutely nothing stopped her from being the fun girl.

I got back home and couldn't stop thinking about her, and thinking up ways of affording to get back to Thailand to see her.

Of course she just carried on doing what she had always done, but when I eventually turned up again, she gave me her full attention. We talked long distance on the phone and eventually after a while, we became an item.

I felt we were as close to being a couple as Thai girl and Farang man can be. She was great, she helped out in lots of ways, we went on holidays together, and for me we were 'in love' My long term aim was to divorce the wife and move to Thailand, live in Burriram and build a nice house.

But then it all started to go wrong. I got jealous. I wanted her all the time just for me, not for a load of fat beer swilling punters who turned up every night.

Eventually I said enough is enough - you leave the bar or I'm going home. So she said OK give me 20,000 Baht a month and we'll see. No chance - not on my wages. So, I left.

Let down, bewildered and still not totally understanding what I'd done wrong. I do now. . I couldn't afford her and I guess she couldn't afford to support her family without that money, but I know she also enjoyed the bar life.

For her it was fun and it meant not living in a quiet village looking after her old parents. And she got a paid for doing something she enjoyed - the nightlife scene. That all came out one night when we both got pissed.

She told me she would take my 20,000 and still work in the bar. That was too much - I guess I'm a dreamer but reality struck and kicked me.

She said she might go back upcountry one day and pick spuds, but I'm back on the buses, a wiser but no less hurt guy who believed for just a while he had become a friend and lover, not a customer.

There's a difference - the delusions and desires of the western man and the ambitions of a Thai bar girl are never far apart in The Land of Smiles.
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.

Offline thaiga

Re: The bar girl stories - How to Spot Good Thai Bar Girls
« Reply #12 on: October 01, 2018, 05:42:18 PM »
Bit of advice from on how to go about spotting a good bar girl. good for who, might be good for you but not the next guy, you never know who the good bar girls are, not by just window shopping, amusing to watch, when the girl grabs the guys hand and trys to pull him into the bar, the guy get really scared, freezes and he's gone. why guys wander up and down beach road till the early hours of the morning i'll never know, when its all at hand every where just waiting for you. the article says, you might get freebies once they are comfortable with you, thats a new one on me. enough from me, have a read.
How to Spot Good Thai Bar Girls           
What is meant by “good” is to get a feel for the type of bar girls that will give you the best experience. The ones happy to be in your presence. When you see a bar girl waving and calling at you to come for a drink don’t just get shy and walk away. I see tons of guys that miss out on good opportunities because they were shy or didn’t even give the girl a chance. Usually the ones that make the move on you and have good attitudes end up giving you an amazing experience. I see something like this: A hot bar girl calls and whistles to a farang walking towards her. The guy seems interested and I can tell wants he wants to hang out with her. She approaches him and starts grabbing his hand. He thinks about it (blushes a bit) and walks away like a scared little school girl. He’s probably thinking, “Hey let me continue walking and maybe there will be another girl hotter than this one”. Or maybe is just to shy and hesitant to go and chat up the girl. Don’t be that guy in Thailand that thinks he is too good for every girl! Heres the thing about Thailand: You never know who the good bar girls are until you at least have 1 drink with them. Of course they are working and want money, we all know this. But that doesn’t mean they are not human beings with feelings. Treat bar girls the way you would to any girl you just met and watch how the interaction goes in your favor.

Listen To Your Gut Feeling About Thai Bar Girls
The point is if you find the girl attractive AND she came up to you showing genuine interest, then take the opportunity. Trust your instincts with these chicks, it is usually right. If it feels wrong walk away. Especially in Thailand. You don’t want to waste your time and money on a girl who isn’t worth it. If the girl the type that just wants to make money as fast as possible, or she doesn’t enjoy what she is doing, just leave and go find someone else. Not all bar girls are the same. It’s all about finding a girl that gives you a good experience! With more experience you will know exactly how to spot the best bar girls! You can usually become close to these types of bar girls and even get freebies once they are comfortable with you. Or maybe you just buy her some dinner. This is highly possible if you build some sort of connection with the girl, especially in Thailand. Even if you are planning on going somewhere else you can still hop in the bar for 10 minutes. Have a beer and get to know the girl a bit better. Maybe it’s worth getting her contact info. You can always meet up with her another time or when she is off work that same night, this happens a lot here. I have done this myself countless times and it pays off.

Don’t Be Afraid to Buy Lady Drinks For Girls
Here is another important point regarding Thai women in general. Focus first on having fun and showing them a good time. Then they will end up liking you a lot. Of course if you feel that the bar girl is the gold digger type that ONLY wants a lady drink and has a bad attitude then don’t keep buying her a lady drink. But this usually happens because you chose the wrong chick. From My experience Thai bar girls don’t like guys that don’t even know how to have a good time. You came all the way here, so at least try to have some fun.

Allow The Girl to Choose You Too
This was my point I was trying to make before: If a girl is showing you interest, this is already a good sign. And if you are interested in the girl too then take the opportunity. This is especially true Thai Go Go girls. When you walk in the bar just relax and have a beer and have a good time. After all this is Thailand. Feel the vibe of the place. If you see the attitudes are bad, or there doesn’t seem to be a genuine interest after 20 minutes then leave. There are always a few chicks that just started working at the bar, or are not hardcore pros that only want a lady drink or money. Many of the ladies in Thailand would like to have a cool foreigner friend and get close with them.

What you have to do is spot these types of bar girls. If you have enough experience you will notice that they are all over the place in Thailand. Trust me, I have been all over Thailand and I see them everywhere. Even in Go Go bars where people think has the most hardcore types of girls. I always a find a few shy ones that give me an amazing experience. I stay contact with most of them and hang out with them sometimes when I’m back in Thailand. Thai girls will test you to see how you react to their questions. Never give Thai girls boring direct answers. Be a challenge to them. Tease them. Joke with them. These chicks love that. Have a playful interaction with them. Try not to make it seem like you are so desperate to go home with them. You should be having fun in Thailand with or without them. Once you put out this type of vibe they will start to be much more open and willing to have fun with you. This type of attitude will take you very far in Thailand.

Talking About Price With Bar Girls
Soi Cowboy Girls, Bangkok ThailandSo you’re in Thailand and having fun. You have a beer in hand, smiling and enjoying yourself with the girl in the bar. Eventually the conversation of prices will surely come up. If you picked her the right way and she had some interest in you to begin with then this will be easy. Personally for me, I usually like to wait until the bar girl asks me if I want to bar fine her. It is very rare that I bring up the topic of money first. She will ask you something like “so what are you doing after?”. Then you casually ask what the bar fine is (if you don’t already know) and find out the price. The bar fine in Thailand is the fee you need to pay to the bar so that she can come with you. You should not be showing too much interest in her so she gives you a good price. You should be able to walk away from bar girls at any given time. This is the right mentality to have in Thailand. It’s like buying a car from the car dealership. If you show so much interest then they will think they can charge a higher price for her time. This is exactly the same with Thai girls.

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.