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Topic Summary

Posted by: surbition
« on: October 31, 2018, 04:37:12 PM »

I'm having a ball ha! ha! look delicious

Most posts on thai/farang relationships, whether blogs or forums, they seem to cover the same ground, all based on bad experiences, we hardly read about the success stories. they are based on isaan girls. bar girls, what about the ordinary thai girl. dont they marry farangs. Thai-western relationships can be good. I married that ordinary girl thai from isaan whats wrong with that.

the balls are a bit over the top priced, they are also expensive back home,wonder why that is. what is an advantage to your stay here is if you like thai food. at least six or seven times a day, i'm asked are you hungry, i now know she means she is hungry, lets eat. getting to know the signs of your partner is a great step forward in understanding her. not often do you see thai people eat alone. they enjoy their food, family, friends or anyone passing sit and eat, your welcome to. while the farang nibbles away at his food in the corner of the cafe reading a book, thats fine, as we differ in our ways.

eat when you like, its hard not to as there's food everywhere you look. odd really when you think of the western breakfast, cerial, toast and jam, egg and bacon. what i do find interesting is my wife needs some herbs, she grows it all in the garden, freshly picked. rice is on every plate, although she might cook a western dish, a little bit of rice will be next to the potatoes.

Thais in most relationships put their family ahead of their husband, some farangs make the mistake of thinking they are second best, thats the way it is, that is thai culture, the head of the family the elder in most cases are not even spoke back to. a farang having a lack of understanding of the Thai way of doing things won't last very long. enjoy your food rolf! rolf!
Posted by: thaiga
« on: October 30, 2018, 03:24:04 PM »

Is thailand really that cheap up 2 u

Is thailand realy that cheap, that depends on you. remember if your from the uk 100 bht = £2.50. i hear often, you live in thailand, why don't you eat thai food. that's a matter of choice for yourself, like the music you listen to, everyones likes and dislikes differ, your personal choice. although the nonsense you hear won't stop you eating what you want, the price might. but if you can afford it, go on treat yourself. for instance

chicken balls at  295 bht a throw that's about £7 for 7 balls, how you doing, oh! having a ball nam ly ly @ Shenanigans Irish bar bangkok

Posted by: nan
« on: October 30, 2018, 02:42:07 PM »

remember this is for amusement purposes only. any complaints take them to your local pyb

HELLO i'm back, although i am not interested in the The recent elections in Brazil, i am surprised how many expats on forums are banging on about this story, how will it effect our lives here, dunno, surprised how many people are still clinging to their life back home, with story's that have no effect on us here. am i missing something.        back to living the dream ...

Now the driving, who likes it, you must not honk your horn could get you in serious trouble. walking the streets at night alone, another thing i dont do. wearing gold very risky in some areas. have you noticed any increase in gun crimes. so life is not how you thought it would be, lets get home and wind a few farangs up on a forum.
good idea give the happy one's some stick, why didn't i think of that before, this guy sounds gullible i'll pick on him. but after the insult your the bad boy, which people will never forget, your now labeled the misfit and what good you have contributed to that forum is now lost, forgotten, folk only remember the bad things in life not the good. all of that because you are not happy with things the way they are in your dream world.

some keep nagging their wife, with things like, back home this would never be allowed to happen, don't bother she aint even listening, it been a way of life for her ever since she can remember. you are the only one that has the problem, as you sit in the back ground not allowed to talk, as the family soaps are on, you can talk but you might not get an answer, 7 o/clock already, i'd be down the pub now back home, with me mates, dart night tonight. nothing to do as your boring life justs ticks away, so you wander back over to the internet, not happy at all, a few more insults which after you think. now why did i say that. there was really no point, but too proud for a sorry.

A study has found out that Apologizing makes one feel weak and incompetent, admitting wrong doing pushes them way out of their comfort zone. but little do they know the respect they would get by others, but unfortunately their pride is more important to them than their feelings. As you know when you have had a row with either your partner, family or even good friends, those hateful words you might or spoke are hurting you more than the person you directed them at.

The emotional baggage about apologizing some carry, when growing up, most have to apologize to their own children, in fact so many times, then when they are an adult their solution is they never want to say they're sorry again. funny how the mind works.
Posted by: surbition
« on: October 09, 2018, 11:47:50 PM »

thank you for the reply nan, yes i noticed in the (xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx) column, no thanks nothing, maybe they are rude. but tamun tun rounded it off nicely. well done that man. now i have been reading the forums, new laws. people are a bit panic mode about the income letter and the crackdown on visa or ext.  if you have the funds you will get the paperwork to go with it. If you have the money, you will not have a problem. go the 800,000 way. our own people have made it bad, there are so many criminals that are coming to light, that have been hiding in thailand for a very long time. although it looks like you will be checked thoroughly until it dies down like everything else. a new broom sweeps clean. so chill. you can't be blamed for what your own embassy is not willing or just can't do for you, nothings changed there, a solution will be found.

edited by Thaiga
Posted by: nan
« on: October 09, 2018, 11:07:46 AM »

hi serbs, that must of been an awful embarrassment, so he's thinking of the kids health, wonder what they think of him, a canadian you say, the nation said there are 1.6 million foreigners living in Thailand between January and August. Canadians were the biggest group – 9,872 migrants
lets hope there not all like him. some do forget their manners at times. Mai chai !

so you ate the goodies, dare i say rolf! rolf!
Posted by: surbition
« on: October 08, 2018, 03:04:23 PM »

a girl who can't say no  ;)  Mai chai could be confusing with some coversations, some thought given to that, do you want to hear a story.

A thai lady who lives nearby, got hitched up with a farang canadian, he stays 3 months at a time, goes home comes back and so on. his wifey speaks to mine, so she invites us round for a chat as he has no friends and i can see why. they have 3 thai children not his, so i take a big bag of goodies for them, chrisps, sweets. yogurts. as we get sat down and done the hello's. wifey hands over the bag of sweets to the kids, which he snatches away, checks in the bag, pulls out the yogurts and said, they can have them but the other rubbish i don't allow them to eat. the kids are moaning in thai. i said all kids eat sweets, not here they don't, he said. his wife saying sorry to mine, very embarrassed. i said do you think they don't eat sweets when your not around, he pointed at the gate. so we left. since the phone calls from wifes friend i'm informed he doesn't allow her to eat som tam.

you can't beat a bit of cod rolf rolf
Posted by: thaiga
« on: October 07, 2018, 04:49:00 PM »

wonder what michael miles would have to say
Posted by: Taman Tun
« on: October 07, 2018, 04:24:37 PM »

Good post, Nan.  The mai chai is a very interesting insight.
Posted by: nan
« on: October 07, 2018, 02:58:23 PM »

This is Thailand, if you dont like it, go home

I hate it when people say that  " if you dont like it, go home "  just not possible for some to go home, a lot don’t have two barts to rub together, maybe some can’t even afford the flight. they might not have anything to go home to, just some of the nastiness in the farang community,  i hate that talk as if they made the grade and the others fell behind, some are looked down upon back home as losers, here they are ok because thais don't realy understand them. so no matter how much they complain about Thailand, they get more respect here than back home. some never made it back home and they never made it here either, so wheres the ideal place to moan, on a forum maybe. if you love it here and are happy, stay away from these losers. they spend half their time here moaning about the country they chose to come to.

this is interesting, i found on

Thai people don't like to say no. This is evident even in their simplest words: “yes” is chai and the closest thing to “no” is mai chai, which translates as "not yes.” This is more than just a simple language quirk. It reflects much about Thai society that isn’t apparent to outsiders until they’ve spent some time in the country.

Thailand is famously known as the Land of Smiles, and its residents pride themselves on being gracious and accommodating. As a collective culture, Thai people are taught to be more concerned with what’s best for the group rather than what suits them personally. Perhaps this is why “no” is always tempered with a “yes”. “Not yes” seems to imply in one small phrase their regret at not being able to consent to what you’ve asked. In fact, when mai chai is proffered, it’s often with downcast eyes and a small bow called a wai or a hand waved in front of the face apologetically.

According to Rachawit Photiyarach, intercultural communications professor at Bangkok's Kasetsart University, “Thais avoid confrontation because they live in a group-orientated culture. Showing emotion is considered immature or rude, so many people value those who can handle situations calmly.”

He added, “Thai society is highly conservative and traditional. It’s a culture where showing gratification and emotion is controlled by strict social norms. This is why showing public affection between couples is considered rude here.”
Posted by: surbition
« on: October 06, 2018, 11:33:14 PM »

Ok saci all is sweet with you and your forgiven, back on the crissy card list.

the media is on about noise pollution, surveys have shown that its one of the biggest problems in Thailand i doubt whether it will go beyond there, if anything is done about it, that will be in the city only, we still have square wheels out here. OK the biggest offenders which annoy me are.

Noisy motorcycs, Soi dogs, Earth lorries, The vendors that go round with speakers on top of there truck what you cant quite make out what there saying. you dare not give them a glance, you'll never get rid of them. The base of music from thats at least 3 kilometres away.

But if we farangs moan about it, you would hear the same old chorus, from your brotherly expats, This is Thailand, if you dont like it, go home. now seeing as the thais have voiced their opinion, can we do the same ;)
Posted by: M.T.Sac.
« on: October 06, 2018, 03:00:34 PM »

forgive me surbition i can't see whats funny in an empty sack anyway, christmas will be upon us soon, father chrismas won't see the funny side either, although he only comes once a year, wouldn't do for his sack to be empty now would it :rclxs0

now be nice i come here to get away from football and faggots on my regular    link deleted by Thaiga
Posted by: surbition
« on: October 05, 2018, 10:24:33 PM »

I must admit M.T.sac i find more fun in reading about the sexual nature of paying or getting a freebie than i do reading your post, but there again i am an honest man. i included forgive me. i will also include a  :wai

did you use that name as a joke 8) if not surely one of your friends if any, might have mentioned it to you.

no offence meant, but you must admit its funny rolf rolf :evilgrin
Posted by: M.T.Sac.
« on: October 05, 2018, 06:37:23 PM »

hi M.T.Sac is that meant as emptysack rolf rolf. forgive me if it is not, just my sense of humour.
serbition if you can drag yourself away from the sexual nature of paying or getting a freebie in the sex department and care to put mt.sac into google
you might get some education  ;) what sense of humour.

M.T.Sac. korat
Posted by: nan
« on: October 05, 2018, 02:21:40 PM »

i have always thought that a girl that charges for sex is one better than a girl who gives it away to anyone

Do you guys talk about sex more times than you indulge in it, seeing as you bought the subject up.

Do you mean a hooker versus a slapper

A hooker is her profession its her work she does it for money, a slapper is doing it because she likes it. the local bike that most have ridden. hooker, slapper, both words are considered pretty impolite, then theres the word harlot, which goes back as far as the 15th century all are  promiscuous woman, along with strumpet, whore, there must be so many words relating to it. the sex saint, is completely undiscriminative in the choice of sexual partners, hence being appreciated by everyone she knows.

all them naughty words are used to judge a women's value solely based on her sexual availability. they are all insults to the person on the receiving end, all based on what a woman’s role is, or was many years ago, when a woman’s life was solely based on serving to a man, with no rights to luxuries for herself or happiness and enjoyment, no freedom of choice. Welcome to 2018.
Posted by: surbition
« on: October 04, 2018, 09:35:09 PM »

hi M.T.Sac is that meant as emptysack rolf rolf. forgive me if it is not, just my sense of humour.

i have always thought that a girl that charges for sex is one better than a girl who gives it away to anyone, not that i like paying anyway, but have more respect for them. oddly enough we tend to be physical with the people that we know the least. another story that.

i agree do take care if you have a good one, look after her.
Posted by: M.T.Sac
« on: October 04, 2018, 06:44:28 PM »

You mention a good wife, a while back my wife had a disagreement with her father, she came home crying saying, my father he doesn't love me, to console her i said, never mind tilac i love you, i love you too, was the answer i got back, since when, i said, she replied, when i see you take care my children. so love comes in different ways.

we then got talking about things, i said, you will miss me when i die. oh why did i say that, the flood gates opened up once more. then she told me about her adventure in looking for a farang after her husband left her with the children for another lady, she had nothing and appreciates what she has now. her favourite saying, i no forget. that was before we met over 16 years ago. she wanted to better her life along with her childrens, i admire someone that goes to great lengths to better themselves, without hurting anyone, so their children are taken care of, a better life.

do take care if you have a good one

M.T.Sac. korat
Posted by: nan
« on: October 04, 2018, 01:36:15 PM »

live the dream wherever you are, thats right, but the dream becomes part of every day life, and after a while you become used to living like that, so use to it, thats its not a dream any more, so it comes to an end and you wake up.

then theres your marriage visa/ext to think of, if thats the way you chose to go, you need your wife even more, lets hope she don't get a touch of menapause, you could be on your knees.

if you have a good one guys, look after her.
Posted by: Oppo
« on: October 03, 2018, 08:49:32 PM »

the guy is a fool, some might not have a lot of cash but if you don't have the price of your fare home, your not a lot of good to anyone. on to living the dream, if your single and only your own nuts to support, then its possible. you can bar it all the way and bang it home till your hearts content.

some problems with marrying into a different age group with a wife some yrs younger, ok at the start with you stuffing horn pills or the likes, everyday to keep the show going, after a while she might want to mix with her own age group to have some fun, that is when a lot of farangs are left to their own devices, hence the drink enters. its an awful thought anyway but a true one, if you didn't have any money when you both met, she wouldn't entertain you, as most are looking to better their lives, so lets not kid ourselves, like the guy sitting alone begging.
Posted by: nan
« on: October 03, 2018, 06:13:07 PM »

70 yrs of age he must be on a pension of about 50,000, a month from holland. we see too much of the begging game lately, the rich farang is no more, some because of foolishness, some trying it on. but by admiting thais took all his money 50,000. that is saying thats all he had in the first place. you can see why they like you to have a return ticket.
Posted by: thaiga
« on: October 03, 2018, 01:46:22 PM »

how many times do we hear, she took everything i had, she took or you give.
this guy is not going to get much sympathy from the thai people after saying they took his money. so often we hear those words. a dutch man 70 years old was pictured sitting next to signs saying thai people stole all my money, 50,000 bht. why didn't he go to the police, did he mess up i wonder and looking to put the blame elsewhere. pics@

Posted by: surbition
« on: October 03, 2018, 11:10:21 AM »

luton is ok

very nice speech bunky in a jokingly way, probably true as you can live the dream wherever you want to, as the dream is in your head and you are happy doing whatever, in one place the same as another. why is it always isaan girls that are said to be gold diggers more than anywhere. good and bad can be found all over whatever country. when a relaionship fails, how many times do we hear, she took everything i had, she took or you give. theres the difference and if you are foolish enough to give away your hard earnt here in thailand, then you would be the same anywhere.

now ask the pyb to turn down the volume a little. ;D rolf rolf
Posted by: bunky
« on: October 02, 2018, 12:03:14 PM »

living the dream. I took the longest flight of my life to go to a place that seemed to only exist in dreams, i'm now living that dream in a place that seemed too good to be true. did we all discover in our own world the secret. it really is that good. although we might not acknowledge each other on the street or exchange a knowing glance. the truth is we all share this amazing knowledge. there’s a place on this planet where a man really can live the dream if he desires in one way or another, some have found it. i also do regret that I didn’t do it sooner. yes even more of a heaven now that i'm back in my own country, luton is ok. ;D
Posted by: nan
« on: September 30, 2018, 09:29:18 PM »

living the dream. for amusement purposes only. any complaints take them to your local pyb

back to reality

living the dream, who would of thought it when you first meet you partner,one minute your looking into each others eyes, over the top of the drinks in a bar,you might be thinking, i have met my long lost love at last, what a great catch, how lucky i am, while she might be thinking, wonder how much money he has, will he take care of me and my kids and family. what a different world two people can think, the farang can pay for anything in thailand but doesn't always own it. your so called dream home, is it really yours though, or is it in someone elses name. as long as you play the game and do what is expected of you., you have a chance of surviving, doesn't seem fair does it. then theres the kids education fees, maybe not your kids but they have to have the best as they have papa farang, cant lose face, wouldn't do, some might talk, can be expensive. are you still thinking, great catch, how lucky i am whilst watching your money dwindle away.

if you have a good wife she might go to work and help to pay with the bills, even more gossip from the locals,farang wife working. not easy for the farang or his wife to live up to the expectations of other people. what ever you do they will find something to gossip about. how spiteful some people can be.

So you settle down to what you think will be a good life together, but its so hard and so different to where you come from. you will think, people are allowed to do what they please here. Oh! that smoke from the neigbours bonfire, have a word, you might say, you cant, we don't want any trouble, leave it you will be told, by someone who knows best. bit like the noise from the party a little way up the soi, you just have to get on with it, its deafening, look on the bright side its drowning the noise from the thai soaps that you just love to listen to, but there aint a thing you can do about it, apart from praying for a power cut, so different to when you was looking into each others eyes across the table, with a couple of drinks inside you when you first met at the bar. is this your dream, could still be, if you learn to live with it and the Thai culture as hard as it seems to be. more to come ... ouch
Posted by: nan
« on: September 29, 2018, 03:20:55 PM »

living the dream. for amusement purposes only. any complaints take them to your local pyb

hi serbi, nice to have a reply. (leave the moaning to the professionals) not a moan at all just telling it how i see it, though some might not want to hear and pretend it never happens.

hi Oppo more jokes are on there way, i do hope for you guys he doesn't raise the level of the visa/ext. that would be just to much at this present time.

living the dream ... really

Expats are so happy, why are they topping themselves, why have they come to the end of the road, have they come out of that dream, hardly a day goes by without the media reporting another has joined the flying club or ended his life somehow. Only yesterday we hear, expat sets house on fire attempts to climb wind turbine in suicide bid, Australian man found hanged in Chiang Mai. then today we hear of young australian of 24 years shoots himself in the head. so sad when there is an alternative other than death, normally its about money or a relationship gone wrong. lack of understanding each other, communication problems, not understanding the thai ways. you can get by and get over things, if you have any problems the last thing to turn to is alcohol, easy said then done when you have nothing else to turn to. sort your life out the best way you can, think of yourself, if your heartbroken, learn to love yourself first. this is not living the dream for guys wanting to harm themselves, just a nightmare. wake up and live reality, you can get over it, happiness can be nearer than you think.

being serious leaving the jokes of the expats woes behind, when lives are on the line there is a need for compassion. the need for someone to talk to, so you are not alone, some people do care.

A single act of caring creates an endless ripple that comes back to you

Posted by: oppo
« on: September 28, 2018, 08:53:53 PM »

What dream   i have a dream house,  i don't own it   i have a dream wife, is she with me to better her life or does she love me
i have a dream thai family, they are all tradesmen, whatever i want done they can do it at twice the normal price
wake up, more jokes to come next month at immigration.
Posted by: surbition
« on: September 28, 2018, 05:55:12 PM »

hello nan, hope you are keeping well. yes i read the articles on the poor old expat, but nothing better than straight from someones experiences or feelings, as most articles although interesting are just copy and pastes of someone else's thoughts.

living the dream, i suppose it might have something to do with your lifestyle in your own country, what your use to and where you have come from, what you was living like in your own country, like working a 9-5 job. then suddenly you have all the time in the world to relax and enjoy the things you never participated in back home. The better we know people, the more likely we are to find fault with them. Long experience of someone or something can make one so aware of the faults as to be scornful.

a rude awakening can come at any time just as you thought everything was perfect and you now live in a perfect world. living nightmares are all around, as soon as i drive my car here is only one of many.

i will leave the moaning to the professionals. nice to read your articles
Posted by: nan
« on: September 28, 2018, 03:24:09 PM »

What with all the evil articles posted recently on the naughty expats, my post seems quite mild, remember that ... for amusement purposes only.
 any complaints take them to your local pyb  8)

Living the dream

are you really or are you fooling yourself,after all it would be a real let down for your ego to admit you made the wrong choice by coming to thailand, so lets pretend all is well, although maybe you can see the dream is slowly fading away. once the honeymoon period is over it still feels like you are on holiday,then the reality starts to kick in that you aren't going home :-[

more than its fair share of nasty bitching guys seemed to have arrived in thailand, mingling in with the ok guys. apart from the forum insults and westerners like the topless scots, complainig about the noise, you only attack people when your not happy i would of thought. then the story of the farang and his thai wife that got killed and buried in there own garden, killed by the wishes of her brother, that was the expats thai family, makes you stop and think for a while,now you have even more to worry about, its good when your wife sides with you and how you think, but can be harmfull for you if jealousy creeps in with her family. jealous conflicts, are worse than anything and people kill other people because of it. what do you think your wifes family want from you which sometimes they get from her and you dont even know about it. a smile, dream on.

Have you let go of your country back home, not a chance with some as a lot of guys come all the way here and talk nothing else than other than the place they come from, is it that good why leave it, is that all they know as in conversation. is that an indication they miss home and there not letting go, you could go on for ever and ever, are you now coming out of the dream or just waking up

more to come ;) lots of it watch this space
Posted by: surbition
« on: September 15, 2018, 03:44:01 PM »

very informative nan, females sucking the blood out, thanks for that, my knowledge is increasing by the day.

jivvy a cure for the MIL bighting, you, put a 1,000 bart note over the mouth of the attacker, stops them in their tracks instantly, the only problem is when they tend to return for another snack. rolf rolf

do you good people remember the 6 funerals i posted about, everyone getting a bit jittery, thinking will it be them for no. 7. we had another death of an elderly person a fews days ago, making it 7 in total. when the news was given over the tannoy by pyb, local people rushed off to help only to find the old lady woke up after 20 minutes, some being very superstitious, having to touch and prod the poor old girl, who didn't know what all the commotion was about, with a crowd of people wai ing her. 

reading up on alternative medicines at the moment, beware
Posted by: nan
« on: September 12, 2018, 12:40:31 PM »

I am here serbi

There are over 3,000 species of mosquito with different allergens in their saliva. Everyone's immune system is not the same. but because it doesn't bother you much now when you get bitten that doesn't mean your free of catching Malaria, Yellow Fever, and Dengue Fever.

So don't go around thinking it's OK to be bitten by mosquitos just because your body has a tolerable reaction to the mosquito bite itself. mosquitoes really do prefer some people to others, even your granny might of told you, you've been bitten because you are a sweet thing. some people produce more of certain chemicals in their skin which might attract mosquitoes, lactid acid.

you might notice some thai people sit with their feet up, i'm sure the reason being that the Mosquitoes have problems flying in even a slight wind, and so they keep close to the ground, makes sense. i've heard if you have a sweet tooth, drink alcohol your more likely to get bitten. old wives tale, could be.

yes jivvy centipedes can be deadly,  (MIL)  you could be right there as only the female mosquitoes bite as they need the blood to produce eggs. the mouthparts are constructed so that they pierce the skin, literally sucking the blood out. :-[  but i could be wrong what do i know
Posted by: thaiga
« on: September 11, 2018, 09:35:51 PM »

Posted by: jivvy
« on: September 11, 2018, 09:29:02 PM »

my question is, what is the worst thing to be bitten by. apart from the soi dog, snakes and the good lady
Probably centipedes and some spiders (and MIL)
Posted by: surbition
« on: September 11, 2018, 09:07:40 PM »

Hey! where's everyone gone, where's nan, can i carry on with my woes in this column.

OK bites, not to eat this time, but insect bites, do any of you guys suffer from moskito or ant bites. when i first come here to Thailand i had to have injections, getting bitten by an insect the whole area would swell right up, nasty. i have been bitten so much over time, the annoyance lasts only ten minutes now, gone. i must be immuned by being bitten so much. is it possible for the body to get used to bites and not react. i see thai people where i am walking in bare feet. they don't seem to be getting any discomfort or are they so used to it.

my question is, what is the worst thing to be bitten by. apart from the soi dog, snakes and the good lady

Rolf Rolf  ;D
Posted by: surbition
« on: September 05, 2018, 03:56:03 PM »

Hi Surbiton,
Another sad episode. I hope there were lots of times when you were able to relax and enjoy yourself.

you bet i have had the time of my life here, not all bad news, but us humans only dwell on the bad times, sort of moaning i suppose, there have been more woes in some expats lives than mine i'm sure, they just don't talk about it. but it does show in their attitude towards others.

before i ramble on i would like you to know that things have come good for us. me and wifey have both realised we have each other, not do i have just a partner in life, also a good mate. my daughter i talked about, has finaly grown up and takes advice. after the one she loved emptied her bank and played the field. not making her untrusted towards people, but to be wary. we managed to get her in responsable employment, as you know, it's not what you know but who, that is how it is, sometimes it can work in your favour without any harm done.

ok murder mystery and suspense. on the way.
Posted by: thaiga
« on: September 04, 2018, 08:36:39 PM »

very modest of you oppo, have little to offer, but life has plenty, and so do we here, your welcome to share

 :cheers   Thaiga
Posted by: oppo
« on: September 04, 2018, 03:49:43 PM »

hi you all, oppo or opposition same guy,does it matter. i find this forum very informative providing useful and interesting information, i have little to offer, but what i have learnt in my time here i am willing to share

ok funerals, i find in this country at funerals how happy the event is, a few tears outa respect but mainly jovial good humoured, smiling people and the band played on. but back home in my country it is all long faces, because that is what is expected of you, if the truth was known they can't wait to get away. then your forgotten, unlike here most have the 100 day remembering of you.

flowers are placed next to the coffin near the crematorium, a chance for all to pay respect and say their final farewell. the respects are normaly paid in order of status and seniority. First the monks, then the councils followed by the children and all relatives, friends, and all neighbours.

Although a lot do have the funeral party at home, and loan all the neccercary, pots and pans, tables and chairs, from the monastry which has it all. it is more convenient to hold the party there, as they are equiped with everything to cater a successful event. these events go to show the community spirit at it's best, as the local women lend a hand preparing the food, having a good old gossip, chattering away whilst working for free, but the cooks are normaly paid by the family of the event.

the tradition is that a thai funeral lasts anywhere between one to seven days. it can be up to seven days to give the opportunities for relatives, family, and friends to attend and pay their respects. also they believe that the soul leaves the body after three to seven days after the death.
Posted by: thaiga
« on: September 03, 2018, 09:37:44 PM »

Amazed just how many people attend a funeral here in Thailand, when someone dies every man and his dog turn up, that's nice i would like to think, respect plays a great part in peoples behaviour, or could be to show face not to lose it, but being so superstitious, if they don't turn up, they may be a bit weary of the dead person looking down on them, oh! my mind.  ::)

What realy annoys me, there is always a party on, nothing wrong with that apart from my favourite local noodle shop is closed. as every one eats at the party, them that live out in the sticks will know exactly what i mean, all the people taking food home in plastic bags, are they making sure they get their moneys worth for the envolope given. as it's free you see them taking hoards of food enough to feed an army, well i suppose the dog is always pleased to see them, when they get home waging his tail.

more on the envolopes later
Posted by: surbition
« on: September 03, 2018, 12:47:52 PM »

hello tamun tun and to all, hope all is well with you

a real odd thing, six funerals to go to, all the people that died lived in a close proximity of each other, although most were not youngsters , like a lot of us. now the temple is full of local people praying and so is the doctors as they check their blood pressure, heart rate. thinking will i be number seven, you know the superstition here, each wondering has the almighty come for me. loads of merit making going on. it is common for Thais to extract wild meanings out of the most mundane events.

back soon.
Posted by: Taman Tun
« on: September 02, 2018, 09:33:23 AM »

Hi Surbiton,
Another sad episode. I hope there were lots of times when you were able to relax and enjoy yourself.
I see from your second post that we still have the drugs and murder to come.
Posted by: surbition
« on: September 01, 2018, 09:25:51 PM »

hello hope you are well

so sad when children grow up, i did enjoy the outings we had when they were young, fond memories. being so cheap in thailand and thinking these children have been nowhere or seen anything, we traveled all over, when i first moved here, seaside, zoos, amusement parks you name it we went, the four of us, it was so good to get away, any excuse while living with that lot of liberty taking scroungers. was not that easy for the children i was tough with them, they had to speak english in the home and my plan worked, now grown up they speak and understand fluent english, my reward was that i succeeded in there education.

years ago when it was noticed at their school they could speak and understand the englsh language. we then had visits from the local school
headmaster, would i do a bit of pointing the teachers in the right direction of pronunciation, i just explained if i was younger yes, but i do not realy have the time, the amount of mums at the school asking my now wife, could we give private education, my thai daughter was top of her class, one of the most alert and brightest in the school.

looking back the kids were realy good until the teenage years, my thai daughter fell in love, or what she thought was love, she run off with a guy, she was 14 at the time, we searched all over, her friends became very helpful when i mentioned money and helped us track her down, using facebook, we eventualy found her, she cried and refused to to come home. i love him dad, she said. so back home we come both of us in tears, nothing you can do, this is thailand. Thoughts were now running through the heads of the two of us that loved her so dearly, will any harm come to her, will she get pregnant. so we got a supply of pregnancy tablets along with some things we thought she might need, went back to where she was staying, she promised to take them as she does not want children.

we all sobbed our heart out, she said, love mum, love you dad, i will phone you. we parted without her for home, not a word was said, just the sound of sniffing and blowing noses from the tears as we drove back to our home, the home was not the same without her, we both missed her dearly. i was her dad, as good as taking care of her since she was a toddler. sometimes i wish i never had feelings, we was at the gates of hell, one more time, just when we thought we had it all together. the family was not complete, the pain took it's toll on both of us. you never know whats round the corner. enjoy what you have while you have it.
Posted by: surbition
« on: August 31, 2018, 09:43:10 PM »

hello tamun tum very nice to meet you, good to see your wife takes care of your health. i always read the forums and take note, sometimes extensive knowledge or close association with someone or something leads to a loss of respect, which i have noticed with some people. so to drop in and share my tears or happiness is easy this way.

nan it was your articles that attracted me to share my experiences, so honest, the way it is, genuine, blunt, plain spoken, truth, have you now realised what good friends you had back home, sometimes we don't realize what life gives us until it's gone. but the piddly pant man brought it to your notice.

 i will have more time tomorrow to add to this column, hope i don't bore you. 

Posted by: nan
« on: August 31, 2018, 05:29:07 PM »

have you been drinking mr.tum  ;) surbition. ah! well you have been working,all work and no play, you must have some recreation  glad your back safe :wai
what honest posts surbition,thanks for sharing part of your life with us

what good friends you had back home ... for amusment purposes only

please don't take offence although some of this is funny/true. it can't be that easy for new arrivals,this is my take on the situation. when you first decide,that's it i'm off to sunny old Thailand,i will have a great time,in the back of your mind thinking,wondering if it all be ok, yea! i'll be just fine,but subconsciously it must be as exciting as it is frightening.

not knowing the language and to keep asking your partner what did he/she say,simmilar to a child asking,having everything explained to you,can get a bit frustrating for you both. some come here running away from their problems at home,but if the problem is within,you are just bringing it from one country to another. saying goodbye to family and friends always puts a tear in your eye,must be a lonley feeling as you lookback walking through those gates at the airport to get on your plane,leaving the country you understand and all your loved ones behind.

your now going to be halfway round the world, for a moment thinking or feeling your now all alone,smiling at people hoping to get a seat next to someone nice. even with all the people around you,still lonliness is there. oh great were finally landed,so you get settled in but still not easy as you don't have any friends yet,nobody understands you,only you,not knowing what the people are mumbling about,must sound like a lot of garbage. what are they saying,so you keep asking,your partner who might say oh nothing,now your even more curious,wondering what was said.

now you are desperately looking for friends,someone that speaks your language, someone that you can talk to that understands,where do you go,yes to the nearest bar of course,you start up a conversation with a farang,at first your so excited as he understands what you are saying,the coversation might go like this,how long been here,he might say,then to be told back home he was an airline pilot,of course he was,sitting there in a beer stained t.shirt,reeking of fags combined with the aroma of sweat and pissy pants. have you now realised what good friends you had back home ;)
Posted by: Taman Tun
« on: August 31, 2018, 04:36:54 PM »

Surbiton, thanks for the story.  It sounds as if the family group was lacking in an alpha female able to keep the drinking under control.  Once or twice I have over indulged with my brother in law and next morning we have both had a severe tongue lashing from my wife.
Posted by: surbition
« on: August 30, 2018, 10:26:08 PM »

hello more woes

I had years of hell living on the family plot, i call them the whisky family, over time i learnt enough Thai to understood some of what they spoke to each other, i could not believe my ears after all i gave them, they thought i was a fool, their idea to drink and i pay. but my partner would never say anything or speak back to her father. every night the same time most of the men sat around right opposite to our home, drinking shouting, the word farang was mentioned every five minutes, you don't have to be smart to know what farang ting tong means. they shouted at their wives as well, demanding to be fed, when the drink finished they would eat and sleep where they fell down and nobody said a word.

I finally had enough, this is not what i come here for, so i gave my partner a choice, i'm off, your welcome to come, as i was packing my bags the kids who were now understanding a little english both sensed what was happening, the tears filled their eyes, i think they also had enough of the family ways, they clung to me one around each leg, sobbing their hearts out. Papa no go, as the tears streamed down my face as i looked into the eyes of these two truly dear and grateful kids. as my bags went into the car my now good lady screamed wait, as she packed a few thing and jumped into the passenger seat with the kids. just like you see on the films, we drove to a hotel where we stayed and talked for a few days, the kids so happy to be away.

over some time we purchased some land built a house and started again we had never been so happy. or so i thought, more pain to come.
Posted by: thaiga
« on: August 30, 2018, 03:34:22 PM »

way too much to tell, but i will get back, to tell you about the whisky family. drugs, murder, you would never believe what i have to tell. that's if it's ok with you people. i thankyou for the warm welcome
yes please do come back - you are welcome - you seem to have attracted a crowd

 :cheers  Thaiga
Posted by: surbition
« on: August 30, 2018, 12:30:41 AM »

How did i meet this lady now my wife, in bangkok whilst on holiday, my rental car needed gas, i gassed my car had a coffee used the toilets, the cleaner smiled at me, little did i know i was looking at my future wife, a toilet cleaner, i now think that was so funny. on leaving the gas station the car suddenly cut out, it would not start, some kind people help me push the car out the way near to the toilets, there was the same girl smiling, as i was phoning the rental people who did not understand a word i was saying, she listened, realised i did not speak thai, held out her hand to the phone and explained my location to the rental people.

from there on we kept contact. as the years rolled by, her father said we could put a home on the family land which we did, it was a small home. in them days it was so cheap and i loved thailand so much, after a while i started to notice whatever i give my partner her family would manage to get their grubby hands on, if they wanted to make a phone call they would use her phone, if they had a journey they would use her motorbike not there own. why because it always had gasoline. she would never speak out to them, we had so many rows over that family, my dream life in thailand was now turning a little sour, in fact a nightmare at times. but i hung on.

way too much to tell, but i will get back, to tell you about the whisky family. drugs, murder, you would never believe what i have to tell. that's if it's ok with you people. i thankyou for the warm welcome
Posted by: Johnnie F.
« on: August 29, 2018, 05:44:10 PM »

I have a sort of personal tale to tell, the worst days i ever spent in thailand can i put it in this column

Go ahead! We're eager to read your story and learn from your experience.


Posted by: surbition
« on: August 29, 2018, 05:25:03 PM »

That's the funny thing about some Thai girls. You never really know what is coming next. They can be absolute darlings and treat you in ways that you have never experienced before, a way you thought was not possible, but it can come with a price tag. one that you might not be able to afford. but you manage it and go without yourself. with no consideration from them to how long it took you to earn that money, your nest egg, sometimes a lifes savings when your at an age unable to recover it, unless you win the lottery.

I have a sort of personal tale to tell, the worst days i ever spent in thailand can i put it in this column
Posted by: nan
« on: August 28, 2018, 03:36:01 PM »

thought it might be a good idea,what with the recent posts of how unlucky some guys just are,we could start a thread to explain the expat woes and the different cultures, to show how far apart they just are. i moan about farangs which some don't like but also give my fair opinion on the thai side as well. so bunky we would welcome as he is an honest poster,with what happened to him,as he said  most expats claim to have the perfect life. is that really true or just saving face. starting with how some thai people are and what expats might think is rude

Paid relationships
I suppose it's whatever floats your boat,so whats the definition of a good relationship as cultures are so far apart. we all think we know best and we are correct with it. but when we travel around the world we get quite shocked as to what the norm is in that country. paying for a relationship,i can hear the words being spoken already,no not me. in the western countries you pay to get out of the relationship,with a divorce, in or out it's a costly old game.

the words are often spoken about farangs in Thailand without the thought of feelings,fondness or love,your wife might be asked is he rich, if she replies no. some might say why did you marry him then, go and find a rich one, like a person is a commodity. so some thai wives are forced into a corner to say yes, just to keep face,then have to keep up a pretence. second question,how much does he give you a month. for a westerners way of thinking thats an intrusive invasion of privacy.

on meeting friends, your wife will be told, oh! hansum man i want one, how old is he. now sounding like you are an object. there is a high percent of farangs thai relationships in isaan,one of the said poorer regions. in isaan the bonds of a family are strong and will sometimes outway the love for a husband. if you are well off and happy with the situation you are in,just pay up. but make your limits known as being over generous,it will be expected of you all the time.