Author Topic: What does make an expat depressed  (Read 1389 times)

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Offline thaiga

What does make an expat depressed
« on: October 14, 2018, 12:54:39 AM »
You mention the flying club, so many sad stories we read about the flying club, yes it is very sad, although lot of articles treat it as a joke, like the guy that tops himself has failed, but i'm doing fine, your a loser. Yesterday being mental health day, a good topic, depression comes in all shapes and sizes, more of a power over your mind when you are on your own, no one to talk to, in a strange land, miles away from home, money short, fell out with your partner, could make the smallest of problems into a big one.

easy to see what can make an expat depressed, the airport seems to be a regular thing for jumping to death, perhaps not being able to face going back home to tell your story, how it all went terribly wrong, maybe you'll hear the words, i told you not to marry a thai girl.

some expats have a problem communicating with their other half, who might not want to listen anyway. but who can you tell or would admit to, making a mistake coming here in the first place, always nice to have a friend from your own country who you can relate to, that will listen. money another problem or the shortage of, the stress that can cause expats, that have to provide for themselves and family, a good thai wife will and can survive on very little to help. if your lucky enough to have a good one, that doesn't sit all day checking her line account or facebook to see who's bragging.

I always feel the expat community doesn't do enough for each other, instead most think they are in competition, like i'm doing better than you, would you feel like that if you knew you could save a guys life, just by befriending him when in need of help or support. of course not.

Separated from thread Finding a Wife or Girlfriend - Sunday’s Seven’s top 10 tips for own topic by admin.
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Offline Johnnie F.

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #1 on: October 14, 2018, 08:20:22 AM »
the expat community doesn't do enough for each other, instead most think they are in competition, like i'm doing better than you, would you feel like that if you knew you could save a guys life, just by befriending him when in need of help or support. of course not.

Lending each other a hand was originally the intention behind opening the first forum for expats in Korat, the old koratfarang.com. But for one it became just like you said, a place for competition. Worse, not just ignorance, it became a battlefield, many attempting to make other's lives even more miserable by bullying, when they spotted a weak point. Why can't there be solidarity?
Fun is the one thing that money can't buy
 
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Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #2 on: October 14, 2018, 04:47:18 PM »
Depression only gets much attention when we read in the media, another one has joined the flying club, or some blogs even worse, with the words, another one bits the dust, making is sound like theres a war on and the enemy has gone down. the attitude amongst some, shows no respect.

being isolated in the back end of nowhere doen't help when you are depressed, yes you can phone around for a chat, but the phone is no where near effective to spill your problems, as being face to face, someone sqeezing your hand and maybe offering a solution, making you feel less alone.

bullying on line, the original forum to be assistance to the expat community koratfarang was more than a battlefield. here's a story i might have told before.

old boy expat in a wheelchair, left alone to his own devices, all he has for company is his keyboard, the internet was his life, thats all he had contact with to the outside world, so he taps away making posts on the forum. one after another trying to make some interest to others, only to be ripped apart by the korat forum bullies with his pals in tow, all playing follow the leader, as they are weary of the bully themselves, so they support his posts and attack as well. needless to say the old boy is no longer with us. i wont go through the details out of respect. would you beleive karma took revenge on most of those attackers, as some of the long time expats and the guys reading this now, will know what evil come their way.

The contributors to this guys death, spent most of their time trolling on line just looking for a small point in someones post that they could use as an attack, by doing this is an is an admittance that their life in the los is not a happy one. Anyone that follows the forums will know what i mean by follow the leader, they need to be in packs. of course there are a lot of good guys on any forum, but are weary of making posts. could be thats why things aint what they used to be. i admire those that don't give a monkeys and post when and where they ever feel like doing, not following the leader.

by the way do you know the war has ended, just thought i'd throw that one in ;D
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Online jivvy

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #3 on: October 14, 2018, 06:28:00 PM »

Quote
by the way do you know the war has ended, just thought i'd throw that one in ;D

would that be the Boer (bore) war....lol
 
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thailand tony

  • Guest
Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #4 on: October 14, 2018, 07:07:11 PM »
I am pleased to have found the forum. we foreigners have lost so much in the west due to keep striving for material things rather than focussing on the more rewarding things of importance in aspects of life such as relationships, both immediate and in a wider community sense. Thailand is changing and wanting to be more like us, (good enough reason to be depressed) while we farang come here to be more like them.

when i came here and got married to a thai, i was told if you last 5 yrs. your be one in a million, now nearly 20 yrs on. my wife is 100% thai she eats 5 times a day. good blog.
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #5 on: October 15, 2018, 12:30:32 AM »
Hi Thailand tony nice of you to drop in - your wife she eats 5 times a day - yes tell me about it - do we have 2 t/t s now ;)

as a rule thai people eat 3 times a day, but not entirely true as they have a habit of 'gin len' ('snacking') my wife gets figity, moany even depressed, if she doesn't eat at the usual time.

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #6 on: October 15, 2018, 12:02:49 PM »
torn between two worlds

So your depressed, feel like packing up and going home, your home is where you lay your hat, going home to your own country, that might make you even more depressed than you are, if you have been here for a number of years, take it from me, back home has changed, people move on, your local pub all new people, wheres everyone gone. myself i was glad to get back here when i visited the uk.

just waiting for a taxi outside the terminal, was depressing on a dark, cold and drizzly night. in actual fact people come to thailand to get away from the everyday life and depression in their own country. so is it a case of your torn between two worlds.

depression and suicide on the rise in Thailand as we are well aware, not only farangs but Thais are experiencing depression and committing suicide in increasing numbers.

some farang suicides are they a case of being drunk and falling over the balcony, like we read in the media, or suicide due to depression. Depression is quite common and is often due to having feelings of emptiness, sadness, anger, hopelessness or apathy. These emotional patterns get in the way of a persons ability to function in their daily lives.

the guys you see sitting in the bar alone, could they be depressed, as drink will only make it worse, sad to see sitting alone looking like you're  at a funeral, the bar is full of lushious ladys isn't that enough to fill a man's soul with genuine happiness. could be worse back home the way things are there, sat in a pub on your own nursing half a bitter, then a trip to the library to keep warm as the leccy bills are so much, out your measley pension.

if your depressed because your bored, how can one get bored here, if you can't find fun here in Thailand, then what is the answer. maybe there doctor has told them for health reasons to limit there beer intake to a couple a day.

so when your out and about leave the miserable old gits alone! one of them could be me ;)
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Offline nan

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #7 on: October 15, 2018, 02:41:18 PM »
the guy sitting looking in his beer, is he depressed, we assume things, which could be totaly different to what we think. could be he doesn't want to join in the fun, does he have to sit there like a grinning monkey. might of had an argument at home, nowhere else to go, he doesn't have any interest in the females in the bar as he loves his wife. just wants to sit quite and think things over with a few beers, he knows the score, does he realy want to look around and smile, to draw the attention of someone that might relieve him of his money.

but at the same time we don't all want to get depressed because of others, so we make light fun of the sittuation and the reasons of depression, or else we would be in tears and all looking into our beer.

no one has mentioned sexual capabilities, could be he's looking down at his old chap, having a quite word, we'll pop in to the pharmacy in a minute, or maybe his friend down below is looking up saying, don't drink to much it makes me sleepy. ;D
ignorance does not help your post one bit but it probably says an awful lot about you.
 
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surbition

  • Guest
Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #8 on: October 15, 2018, 08:48:51 PM »
you guys certainly have interesting discussions, so i thought i'd add my bit, there is plenty of this sort of thing on a lot of forums, the only difference is they are followed up by lots of silly posts of one liners, from people who don't realy know what life in thailand is all about, are they lonely and depressed themselves, do the insults make them feel better, i feel sure these sort of replys would not come face to face.

myself,  i have been depressed at times, the times i opened my mouth to argue with the mrs. hurtful words are easy to say, even to someone you love. the problem being when i first arrived here and everything being so much different to back home, i would blame it on Thailand if anything went wrong. f in thailand i would always say, with s/hole attached on the end. then i would get the silent treatment from her, i think you know what i mean, that would make me even more depressed than ever, as i was now arguing with myself. but subconsciously thinking why did i open my big mouth in the first place, it didn't resolve the sittuation.

blaming your problems on thailand is looking for an easy way to dump your problem elsewhere, apart from hurting the thai person it is aimed at, it still doesn't solve anything, only makes two people depressed. i now try to keep my mouth shut. after all its not my good ladys fault anyway.
we seem to look to avenues to put the blame on.
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #9 on: October 16, 2018, 11:44:23 AM »
could there be more guys are depressed in their own country than here in Thailand

Love and sex, every couple is different, every love story is different, but there are remarkable similar patterns. with different cultures so far apart, so foreigners engaging in love and sex in Thailand might get it wrong, there is enough reason for the macho man to get depressed. he might of got a bit lost with what he's use to. we all hear of bad stories, but don't hear so much of the success stories. just depression, doom & gloom, she took all my money, her brother turned out to be her other man.

when you first get here in thailand you can't wait to get home to tell your friends what a great time you had, how many you got in the sack, how cheap it was, compared to the cold girls in your own country it was heaven. thats known as the first phrase, where you are still growing up in thailand.

i should think there is more guys depressed in their own country than there is here, esecially if you have already experienced the delights of thailand and are now back home, living out the memories of the good times you had. more depression sets in if you had some paid sex, you will feel the emptiness right after the dirty deed, so will your nuts, maybe M.T.Sac can tell us more if he can break away from football and the mens company. lol.

so after your bit of hows your father, is over, a sense of emptiness even loneliness steps in, as the pretty girl says good bye hansum man, Arr! never mind, of course you knew you only bought the time.

having sex and loving as long as the sex lasts, is just that, but loving someone then indulging in the lovemaking is so much different, you want to and can give more pleasure to your partner than you could imagine.

oops! more depression, did she realy orgasm or did she fake it to make me feel good, you'll never know, funny ole game init ;)
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Offline nan

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #10 on: October 16, 2018, 03:03:42 PM »
I feel sure that there are more happy expats than sad, but it is not at all nice if you are depressed, we all have our ups and downs, found an article that might explain a few things by https://www.humanresourcesonline.net/depression

Depression is the number one mental health issue faced by expats

In a survey on mental health issues faced by expatriates, depression turned out to be most prevalent condition (with a 50% increase between 2014-16), followed by anxiety (28% prevalence increase).

Aetna International’s report on 5,000 members, Expatriate mental health: Breaking the silence and ending the stigma, also found that globally, women between the ages of 30-49 are the most likely to seek treatment for a mental health concern.

The research focused on expats, given that just 6% of expats have been found to be concerned about mental health issues before relocating. ” Dr. Mitesh Patel, medical director, Aetna International, explained: “Part of the reason expats are more susceptible to mental health issues is the absence of the family and friends network they relied on for support back home.”

He added: “By comparison, more than a quarter (of expats) were concerned about heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, and cancer. In addition, we found among the people surveyed, that expats on assignment expressed a reduced need or desire to take action prior to arrival.”

According to data between 2014-2016, mental health claims increased the most in Europe (33%), followed by the Middle East and Africa (28%), and the Americas (26%) not far behind. Southeast Asia saw the least increase in mental health claims during this period at 19%.
ignorance does not help your post one bit but it probably says an awful lot about you.
 
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Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #11 on: October 16, 2018, 05:18:41 PM »
Part of the reason expats are more susceptible to mental health issues is the absence of the family and friends network they relied on for support back home

Yes nan agreed, so more the reason to learn to look after and fend for yourself, as some so called friends, you might fall over if you happen to lean on them. you know the chances you take when you decide to make thailand your home, you know your going to be alone, even in the understanding department, Err! what did he say, no good turning around and asking someone, you won't get understood. your on your own son, as they say. you have to learn to look after yourself, no.1.

if you have some money and your worried, don't bring all, just in case, something to fall back on. if you cant and you don't have much money and your relying on luck, if either runs out thats when the depression could set in, if you come here on a wing and a prayer and things go wrong in the partner department. its not nice and easier said than done, but its possible to start again, rather than go back home and sit unhappy there.

as some of the expats reading this post could tell you, no good running back, its possible to move on in los, new home, new wife. different enviroment can be the medicine of life. if your pocket stretches that far, you can manage on very little if you realy need to and with very little money at least you will know your loved by your new partner. after all we are all hansum men.

on saying that it would crucify some including myself, must be hard to start all over again, take my hat off to the guys that never run back.
so be nice to the wife ;)
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 

Offline nan

Re: What does make an expat depressed ... depression test
« Reply #12 on: October 17, 2018, 12:33:58 PM »
you can test your depression below ...

although there are some options in Thailand for people who are depressed that need someone to talk with. the problem being is the awareness of these services to expat’s in need of them.

from the nhs.uk...Depression is more than simply feeling unhappy or fed up for a few days. Most people go through periods of feeling down, but when you're depressed you feel persistently sad for weeks or months, rather than just a few days, you realy need to talk.

Some people think depression is trivial and not a genuine health condition. They're wrong – it is a real illness with real symptoms. Depression isn't a sign of weakness or something you can snap out of by pulling yourself together. it affects people in different ways and can cause a wide variety of symptoms. They range from lasting feelings of unhappiness and hopelessness, to losing interest in the things you used to enjoy and feeling very tearful. not nice at all when you are feeling constantly tired, sleeping badly, having no appetite or sex drive, and various aches and pains.

being depressed where you may simply feel persistently low in spirit, while severe depression can make you feel suicidal, that life is no longer worth living. can be easily triggered by difficult times and problems that you are going through. below is a link to Depression self-assessment test

link depression test 

link edited by Thaiga
ignorance does not help your post one bit but it probably says an awful lot about you.
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #13 on: October 17, 2018, 04:25:10 PM »
Whoopie! i scored 0 in the test - Based on your responses today it's unlikely you're suffering from depression. :)
but after reading this post the outlook could change - lets not wander away from the truth ::) OK ere we go.


You could not get more depressed than a failed relationship and although its cost you money and you once again have to sort your life out, doesn't mean the journey here was worthless you have learnt something about life experiences. one minute you are attracted by the warmth of that Thai woman, the next you may see the coldness and cruelty of that same person. the dark sides could emerge in full swing.

i've seen grown men brought to tears over a break in a relationship, oddly enough their partner, the woman always seems to whether it well, more than depressing for the guy as its his money been spent, his heart broke, she falls back on her family, your left standing in a strange country on your own. the emotion of all this can make this extremely exhausting, enough that you just want to end it all, a horrible feeling, i have experienced back home, you can get buy, yes easier if your back with your folks i know.

we haven't mentioned age yet, most of us guys are getting on a bit which would make the situation even worse, at the time of life when you think and need someone that will take care of you and i sincerely hope they do. till the end. these are not nice words, we don't want to even think about it, but don't dismiss it. if you have a few bob its much easier, but imagine being old and broke, not a nice thought guys, put a bit by for a rainy day if you can. keep mum and i wish you all the best.

What does make an expat depressed, err! reading Thaiga's posts ;)
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 

Offline Johnnie F.

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #14 on: October 17, 2018, 05:23:33 PM »
What does make an expat depressed, err! reading Thaiga's posts ;)

I wouldn't dare to contradict you! But couldn't it also be not having all this comfort back at home, having to go to a foreign country for that?
Fun is the one thing that money can't buy
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #15 on: October 18, 2018, 02:42:42 PM »
I wouldn't dare to contradict you! But couldn't it also be not having all this comfort back at home, having to go to a foreign country for that?
you could be right - comfort is the word - comes in all different ways - comfort of the warm climate, must be good for you, getting on in life, aches and pains in a cold land, no thanks - comfort of a loving relationship - even comfort for the hardened drinker with the cheap prices.  :drink

Wait a minute this won't do, this is the depression thread  :-[ and what a lot of attraction it has found.
                             
 loads of views, not from depressed people i hope, stay cool 8)                 

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #16 on: October 18, 2018, 04:52:55 PM »
although social media is a godsend to many of us, it is never truly a substitute for proper, human, face to face contact. living in thailand especialy at first can be a challenge in itself. but we are all different, like the saying, one mans meat is another one's poison. you realy do need to have a purpose in your life, if you have worked all your life, then retire, of course your going to need a hoby or something to do or you will begin to feel useless. some get a sense of failure not having a role in life, not earning a wage, thinking or hoping the pension will be enough to live on, all adds up to depression.

How do you plan your life if your not sure this is the life you want, so going back home is not as easy as you think, oh yes your friends might still be there, the place might be the same, but the hardest thing about going back is, your not the same as when you left. them that have gone back might find their life now in their home country was worse than when they left to come here, as its us that changes.

if you like thai people and thai food, you got it made, but remember you"ll never separate the two ;)
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #17 on: October 19, 2018, 04:24:27 PM »
there are a fair few expats unhappy here, do we change that much as the years roll on. i suppose we do, when i first came to bangkok and sampled all the delights, found it hard to believe you could buy what ever made you happy, for a pittance. but you was only happy for the time you paid for and the few memories that went with it. ko samui, pattaya it was great, so i moved here to thailand. now i laugh when i sit back and think as i now live right out the way in the sticks, far away from all what attracted me here in the first place. did i outgrow it or have i grown up, or is it i know its there when i want it.

there are a few farangs where i live, but whenever i have a conversation with them, they always moan about thai's and thailand, like, how they have to travel miles to do their 90 days. they are so depressing, did time make them like this. i Really love my life here in Isaan, why are some so bitter, angry and unhappy in general, who see themselves as nothing more than victims here, a few are constantly using swear words, bitching about not only thai people but also happy farangs. some expats i know have had more trouble from a fellow expat, than they ever did with a thai person. i often joke about the things in thailand and yes there are problems, but don't crack yourself up about it.

A trip back home for a couple of weeks, will sure to cure the depression - meanwhile here in thailand - tomorrow will be the same same but different
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Online Taman Tun

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #18 on: October 20, 2018, 12:33:42 PM »
Thaiga, you should try and sign up the moaners to KF.  We could run a moaners league table.
We are masters of the unsaid words, but slaves of those we let slip out. Churchill
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #19 on: October 20, 2018, 02:05:25 PM »
Thaiga, you should try and sign up the moaners to KF.  We could run a moaners league table.
that might break the   Most Online Ever: clock ;)
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #20 on: October 22, 2018, 02:32:26 PM »
Depression can be caused by worry, worry can be caused by health problems. when we think everything is coming up roses, is it. we always talk about how every thing is so cheap here in thailand, is that to make us feel good, as some things are not, in fact they are expensive. Pang Mak! Mak!.

back home we have the health service, we always joked and moaned about it and how bad it was run.
 
BUT ... it was free.

getting on in life, medical insurance in so expensive here as some of you know, the hospital charges are a joke, do they pick a number out the air trebble it times ten add the number they first thought of, there you go.

about 7 years back i had a major operation, bangkok hospital Korat, 2 days in. the surgeons bill alone was 30,000 bht. they make you feel very comfortable by asking for a 10,000 bht. deposit in case you don't pull thru, :-[ gulp.

2 days later, time up, pay your bill, total 87,500 bht. 57,500 for 2 days room and care. almost 29,000 bht for a day. that's depression.
 must be even dearer now.

so i didn't have medical insurance, would they have charged more if i did.

stay healthy guys
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Offline nan

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #21 on: October 22, 2018, 03:54:08 PM »
that is expensive depression at its best. look on the bright side, you might be quids in for the number of years you have been here. as opposed to having medical insurance, at todays prices.

could it be that they match the cost of them with insurance, as the broker won't moan as they just increase the price, if there out of pocket. bit like insurance for you car. also you the need care from a relative or friend as the nurse only takes care of the medication side.

ignorance does not help your post one bit but it probably says an awful lot about you.
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #22 on: October 22, 2018, 05:49:10 PM »
we all know that alcohol is a depressant, so why do some drink when they are depressed. turning to booze is just not the answer, why punish yourself. could be that it has many short term effects that often feels like its helping with a bout of depression, maybe it does as depressions differ so much, is it all in the mind, perhaps alcohol has some unique reactions to any given self medication give that minute of relief, a couple of drinks can reduce inhibitions, allowing those with social anxieties to break through barriers that trouble them although the quality of sleep is poor, a person fighting depression wouldn't care too much about insomnia.

odd how the metabolism works in different ways for different people, to sum it up the antidepressant value of alcohol will be more appealing to and effective for some individuals with depression than others. but so many reach for the bottle.

looking for a way out is not a crime, folk that don't drink should realise that, a problem is not a crime, help is needed.

someone with anxious depression may just want a relaxant, like you hear some say, oh! just the one. there are medications that can deal with the problem, finding the right one might be the biggest problem, whereas alcohol is more easy, the mind thinks and you don’t need a prescription. but like a double edge sword you may feel good for a while but in the long run, a different story. as the sudden crash in pleasure and rise in stress, as the effect of alcohol wears off, which varys so much from person to person.

lets not forget when someone is depressed, they are pretty vulnerable, but lets not lose our sense of humour

the biggest depression would be for some, if a two tier price was introduced on alcohol for farangs. Oh! no ;) take care
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #23 on: October 23, 2018, 12:09:20 PM »
one of the most depressing things in thailand is driving, do the people here not care if they get killed in a road accident, yesterday out with my family coming home from what was supposed to be a relaxing day out, turns into a nightmare, not just caring for myself, but innocent lives of others traveling with me were put at risk, by drivers wanting to save just a few seconds. the worst offenders were people coming head on towards you, overtaking, coming onto your side of the road, when there is no room, so you have to drive in the motorbike lane because they don't want to wait.

Frightening that these people don't care about their lives, so what can you do, nothing is the answer. only today we read 11,000 people have been killed on the roads already this year, these people who's familys are crying, some go out and do the self same thing. looking in your rear view mirror, you can see the impatience of some, nearly touching your rear bumber, the people are so use to it as it happens day after day, hardly makes the news, so who cares

they don't cry till they see the box - with an amulet on of course ;)
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 

M.T.Sac.

  • Guest
Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #24 on: October 23, 2018, 02:07:47 PM »
got to agree with you on the driving aspect, it's appalling. not the full fault of the people but more than they are allowed to get away with. tatoos to keep you safe are an expensive item, just to be put in the box. laws are not agreed with by the majority, so they are dropped. you have to look popular or your not liked. farangs copy as well, picking up the bad habits. don't forget its another depression day for the drinkers, below. October 24 

M.T.Sac. korat
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #25 on: October 23, 2018, 09:23:41 PM »
wow M.T.sac you can contribute a reasonable post when you want to :salute

although a known fact that people who live their life overseas struggle with some depression at one time or another, i don't see much research into it, there really is a need for mental health support in the international expat community here, when you see the amount of suicides.

counselling is available, i suppose, but would you need to pay for it, if you found where to go, like bangkok, getting there is enough to depress you and in that state of mind it certainly wouldn't be an idea to drive there, on arrival you might find the help you need is in a different language or culture, would realy need someone that speaks and understands the ways of the western people. so being here in thailand you do realy need a good friend or someone that cares and can give you advice, or even drive you to where you need to go.

even if your a pensioner, they say exercise a little is good for you, without overdoing it, walking is a great exercise, do what you can, also it will make you sleep better. not understanding the language or where to go to even buy something you want, all adds up to feeling useless making it easy to think you’ve lost control of your own life, you know the feeling when your out shopping, when you don't understand and have to turn around and ask the wife, she normaly sorts it out.

now how depressed you would feel if you couldn't do that, you was no longer an item, i think that is where most of the suicides happen, you never thought coming here on that plane when you was so happy, a new life, then bang, your all alone, enough to tip the scales in your mind, there's nothing left for me, no reason for me to be here. feeling very sad. that is when you need to be connected to a community, people that know you. but being depressed is not easy going out to find company, you go in a bar, do you think there bothered, they don't want to listen to your problems, they are there to make a living, a couple of drinks your even worse, horrible thought.

so when you see the miserable long faced farang staring into his beer give him a smile, might save his life
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #26 on: October 24, 2018, 11:44:50 AM »
when i said exercise is good for depression, i didn't mean in a room above a bar, lol. ;)

the wonder and excitement of you new life and home here in thailand is natural to begin to wear off, the longer your here. the food that was once exotic becomes now an every day thing, just like bread and potatoes back home, the newness starts to wear off, now all is getting a bit boring. then an argument with the wife, these things are often enough to make many consider why they even left their home in the first place. what was all the hype about on coming here, makes you feel sometimes like packing it in and going home. now how would you feel if you had nowhere to go back to, like some, you sold your home to come here, the money is nearly finished in building your new home here, not in your name, row with the wife not talking, what do you do, not nice at all, once again in your life you feel so alone. unlike back home, where you'd go and have a chat with your mates, what do you do, have you found a life that you have to eat humble pie, just to stay reasonalbly happy, different ball game here.

do people you cry your heart out to realy listen anyway, giving you, oh you'll be ok your just a bit homesick, not realising you could be on the road to mental health issues, totally unaware of the signs and symptoms of depression. if you can reconize your problem you will be able to deal with it more easily. fatigue normaly sets in, you loose your motivation, worst of all thoughts to hurt yourself, as thinking your to blame.

you can brighten yourself up by just having a simple meal from back home, something you miss, talk and find some company from your home where you come from, which might boost you and give you some mental stimulation, it will certainly cheer you up. when you feel like bitching about something here in thailand, bitch to yourself and do what i do, find light in the things that annoy you, find the funny side, turn them into a joke, making life easier as most of us look back on things in time and have a good laugh, like, did i realy say that.

here is a link with phone numbers for Samaritans of Thailand. whether its still operational i don't know.

Samaritans of Thailand Bangkok & chang mai  befrienders.org
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 
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Offline Johnnie F.

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #27 on: October 24, 2018, 11:49:54 AM »
when i said exercise is good for depression, i didn't mean in a room above a bar, lol. ;)

Is glass-lifting in the bar any better?
Fun is the one thing that money can't buy
 
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Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #28 on: October 24, 2018, 12:03:48 PM »
if you do the glass lifting first - then it will be limp lifting in the room above the bar after - tut tut money wasted :-[
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 

Offline thaiga

Re: What does make an expat depressed
« Reply #29 on: October 24, 2018, 02:56:49 PM »
here is another link to samaritans of thailand english hotline although i hope you never need it

samaritansthai.com
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.
 

 



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